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Volunteer story from Portugal.

EVS

Braga, Portugal, (Harun)

Life under fear. Life under pressure. Life under the complexity of life. and do you know how life drives you?

I have been there, in the down line of fearfulness of moment, when the only thing that came to my mind is scare, scare of being left, scare of being stuck, scare of ruin things, scare to do anything until I found myself down there in rural village of numb maybe it is wrong but I don’t know, but what I am trying to say is, at least fear makes you more careful to take another step.

I have been there in the bottom of the pressure, to be there earlier, to run faster, to climb higher, to dive deeper, to sing louder, to do better, then I asked myself ‘are you not tired of those tension?’ Is it that necessary to do like they command? Is it that necessary to become the first man who touch the finish line? Is it that necessary to stand in the top? Yeah, is it that necessary? I don’t know, why don’t you try to relax and help others to arrive together, to be done together, to stand in the top together, to be better together?

I see through this 21 years of my life and I understand, the complexity of life is like a tangled thread. You have to fix it carefully, you have to do with patience, you have to keep up with the first, then maybe you solved it.

The context of being here, in Braga, in one of the finest city in Portugal, even in Europe, I broke all those old habits. I moved on, I did what my inner self could never do; go somewhere out of my comfort zone. I did what the negative voice of mind could never do; dare to step up when there is a chance. The funniest thing is, I do what my childhood stupid dream: living abroad.

I also stop to be always in under pressure, to breath, to realize, to rethink what I have and have not done something that useful to my environment, to love myself, to chill and enjoy this wonderful life. Because, I believe, we need that.

The way I see my life is that something is coming, we need to be prepared and be ready to face all the giant troll of a problem, and yeah it is always not easy and complex to fight the troll but what I know and believe is, I can smack you.